Thursday, February 23, 2006

Long Break

Yes, I am going on one. At least a week. I am not sure when I can make myself start, but I am sure it will be on Monday, if not before.

I need to shut this thing off and focus on the kids, and getting more active. I have cut out sugar and wheat, am drinking more water, eating far less meat and quit my beloved Starbucks treats cold turkey. *sniff* It has been three days since I had one and the fact that it is torture to me is pathetic. Says a lot right there. I COULD just do the less fattening one, but I won't even allow myself that much until I get to a certain weight. I have put on 5 lbs in the past few months just from drinking those blasted things 3-4 times a week. Enough is enough!

Perhaps by the time I turn this on again, I will have located the photos I want to put along with various posts.

Although I DID want to announce that Brain was nominated "Student of the Month" at his classes that he attends. He got an award for being respectful, considerate and helpful. There is a funny story that goes along with it, but I need to get to bed.

I will miss reading all the blogs and yapping on here.


Wednesday, February 22, 2006

I find this amusing

This is not what is amusing. I just wanted to add this:) Princess on her way to the HSing Valentine's Day party. Note the Hello Kitty Necklace. Stud gave that to her that morning! Was she pleased!

I am watching my friend J's two boys today. We shall call them "Giggles" and "Smiley". They are the SWEETEST BOYS I have ever come across. Giggles is the same age as Jock and Smiley is the same age as Clown. They all get along famously. Never been any conflict. The names I have thought up are exactly how they are. Giggles is always giggling and Smiley never stops grinning.

So Brain is playing a video game that Giggles brought. Giggles and Jock are playing Lord of the Rings Stratego while Clown and Smiley were downstairs playing Checkers. Princess was taking photos of the cats laying about. She is quite the photographer lately, I think I will post some of her work on here.

So I agreed to let the younger group play video games. Clown and Princess have recently caught the bug, but Clown gets very agitated and is grounded from it for weeks at a time. He yells at the TV, calls characters "Moron" and "Idiot", throws controllers to the floor, etc.

It has been a few weeks since he has played, so I told him if he controlled himself, he could show Smiley a few games. Princess and I decided to colour in a colouring book while they played, then she and Smiley would play.

This is what you would have heard if you had been down there -

Clown: OH YEAH! Take that! UH HUH, I am coming after you!!!

Smiley: What am I supposed to press??? What DO I DO!?!?!?

Princess: Smiley, press the A. NO NO! THE A BUTTON!!! Mom, can you pass me the yellow??

Clown: WE DIED!?!? WE DIED!?!? NO SMILEY!! If you had just pressed (then tells him details of what he was supposed to do) your guy would not have fallen off of there and we would have defeated them!! Let's try again, ok???

Princess: Clown, be nice to Smiley. Smiley, when you and Clown play 3 more rounds, I will play with you, ok???

He ignores her.

Princess: *shrug of shoulders* Hmmmmm...I guess Smiley doesn't hear very well. Mom, what colour is this, it's ugly!!!

Me: Looks like baby poop, but it is called "Bronze Yellow".

Princess: EEEWWWW...I can't use that for her dress!?!?!? What about that pink over there, can you pass me that?? OH NO!!!!!!!!!! GET THE WAND!! GET THE WAND SMILEY!!!


Princess: *holding back tears* I was just trying to help! He needs to get the wand! Smiley, did you know what to do when Yoshi falls off of there???

Smiley: No! What do I do??

Me: CLOWN! Would you PLEASE tell poor Smiley what to press!?!?!?

Clown is immersed in the game and has no idea what is being said most of the time.

Princess: Ok, Smiley. Press R if you want to (I can't remember) and then go over to the left and jump on the (Again, can't remember details) and you can...

On and on she went. I think Smiley is going to get it eventually and I know that he will get more help when Princess is right there playing with him. I find it amusing, how she was desperate to help him, but Clown just got annoyed because Smiley did not instinctively know exactly what to do on a game he has never played before.

At one point Princess muttered "Sheesh. I am just trying to help." I should have prepared her and told her that no matter how much she tries to help guys, even when they ask for it, it won't be appreciated. I will prepare her one day, but for now, I kept out of it for the most part.

Maybe you had to be there to see/hear it, but it was quite entertaining. Let me look through some of her recent fascinating photography and add it to this for you all to enjoy!


I don't think I can post the picture I spoke of in my last post. I can't find it!!!

Ok, so I knew I was pregnant with Jock, long before any test results would agree with me. We women know our bodies, right???

Finally, the blood test revealed that yes indeed, I would have another baby in June of 1995.

I was sick. Very sick. I was so sick we decided we would only have two kids. I was sure I would not be able to live through something like my pregnancies again. I am sure I was just as sick with Brain, but since I had to work for a while, I had no choice but to "suck it up". EEEEEeeewwwww, that can be taken in a bad way.

Let's carry on and get that awful vision to go away.

So yes, since I was so sick and we thought we would only have these two, we agreed to find out what this baby was. I wanted one of each and thought that if it was another boy, I better find out now and give myself time to get used to the idea of no daughter. I have since matured past that silliness, but at the time, was very serious about it. My parents were down from Canada and my Mom was in the room with us when we found out. That is a very special memory for me!!!

He was also 11 days overdue. I was induced with him also, just as I was with Brain. Opppsss, almost typed his real name in there. LOL!! I was even going to give birth to them in the same room, when I got a nasty prank phone call. The staff looked things up in the records and apparently the same thing had happened when I was in there giving birth to Brain. Maybe there is something with that particular room, but they said it had only happened with me. Weird. So they moved me.

So he was born easily, a few pushes and there he was. We took him home and started the adventure with two children. I remember when he was about 4 days old, trying to go get groceries. I was near tears. I could not figure out how to get him strapped to me (I have never understood those people who carry small babies around in those car seats, you know??? I want the baby next to me as much as possible) and get Brain out and then get them both settled and back into the car after we were done shopping. It was quite a feat somehow. That was a scorcher of a summer, so I remember standing there and being over tired and VERY HOT. YUCKY. I don't like hot.

By the time he was 4 months old, he was the weight Brain had been at two years. Yes, you read correctly. That is not a typo. I remember he could not get enough food and I would sit trying not to cry, I was so happy. When he was 10 and 11 months old, he and I got up at 5 every morning. He had a HUGE bowl of oatmeal, a banana, and toast. By eight o'clock, he was tuckered out and went for his nap. Brain got up and he and I had time together while Jock slept.

He had strawberry blonde hair that stuck straight up on his head. Similar to a baby with FAS. That is Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, for those who do not know. I had many foster brothers and sisters who had that. His hair reminded me of that. This lasted a few months and then the red went out of it and it was laying straight against his head, white blonde.

He was always very interested in cars, trucks, etc. He was a typical boy in that way. Brain had never cared, but Jock would sit and babble to his toy trucks, stroke them lovingly and just chatter away to them for as long as 45 minutes. It amazes me how early their personalities are clearly shown.

If Brain was in the room, Jock never took his eyes off of him. It was SO CUTE!. Brain ate it up too, he loved the adoration:) Man, those were the good ole days!! Brain would be talking about something and walk past Jock. Jock would keep his eyes on Brain and try to eat anything that went near his face! LOL It was SO FUNNY!! He was just sitting there, but if I leaned over, or someone reached for something, he would try to eat them and then look all timid and ashamed when he realised that whatever it was, was not food:)

We moved from here to SC when Jock was 6 weeks short of his 2nd birthday. I told him I was going to write about him here and he forbid me from telling some of the adorable little phrases he would say when he was learning to talk.

A few things I CAN tell though. Within the first few weeks of being there, any time he saw a Van that looked like our good friend's from here, he would freak out. It was adorable but very sad. We would drive along and he saw a van like their's. He would start bouncing in his seat and smile and wave to anyone who may see and say with a huge contented sigh "Go home now!!!!! BYE!! Ok. Ok, go home now." The van would get farther from us and he would frantically start calling his friends Ashley and Johnny, convinced that they were in there and for some reason were leaving him.

"AAAAAAAAA-EEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! Joh-eeeeeeee! GO HOME NOW!! GO HOME NOW!!!!!!!!!!" He would be patting his chest frantically, because he could not say his name, but was trying to get them to see that HE wanted to go home now with them.

This happened almost every time I took the boys out anywhere. After about a month, he quit. It was so hard for me, though. Because I wanted to come home here also. I wondered what was going on in his little mind. I knew that he honestly believed that was them. I can't imagine how confused he must have been, wondering why they would always drive away and ignore him.

So I will continue this soon. I have pictures to go along with these, but it will be a while before I can get them on here. So now that I think about it, I may just wait a while to continue the posts on the kids.

I don't want to delete this or save it, so sorry. Will talk about other things until I get photos arranged that will go with these posts. Maybe you all don't care, but I do:)

That is it for now!!!

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Pet Peeve

OK, this is one of my biggest ones. Something that makes me want to SCREAM loudly like a lunatic.

WHY, oh WHY, when you are in the bathroom, do the kids feel the need to wiggle the door knob as they talk to you!??!?! ARG!!!

First of all, I have just recently been able to shut the door again, after years of needing it open and having NO privacy. The kids panic. People with small children know exactly what I am talking about.

So after years of putting in my time of peeing and showering for the entire house to see, now I get a break. I get to have a closed door. I almost forgot what it is like and sometimes still forget to shut it, out of habit. This greatly distrubs my older children, so for their sake, I try to remember to shut it.

Their father is home, but for some reason, suddenly when I shut the door to the bathroom, they feel the need to come talk to me. Not only can I hardly hear them through the door, but as they talk, they stand there hanging onto the doorknob!??! I think they are doing some manner of acrobatics or something, from the sounds of things. Sound like the thing will be ripped out of the door sometimes.


And why can they not just stand there and talk?? I don't understand that.

For some reason it drives me bonkers.

Have a great day!

Monday, February 20, 2006

I totally forgot!

Ok, I am not done raving about Brain. I completely forgot to fill you all in on his health issues and what led up to his recent surgery.

He always had the food allergies, skin disease and was small and scrawny. Even as a newborn, when he was gaining like crazy and nice and chunky, he just did not eat. I had to wake him up all the time. He would go hours and hours without eating, if I did not try to nurse him. Never seemed to feel hungry. I was concerned, but when I DID try to feed him, for the most part he would eat. He was gaining weight, etc, so I did not worry too much.

Then when he was failure to thrive, losing weight and would not eat at all, I got really concerned. He was incredibly picky, and I did not want to encourage that. However, if there were 3 things he would eat, I gave them to him over and over again. I was not about to start lecturing on trying other foods, etc. He seemed to always feel so sick, and was so cranky because of it, I did not want a melt down. Stud and I had to walk on eggs shells because if we did one wrong move or said a certain thing, it would set Brain off into a fit that would end in him vomiting anything he had actually ingested. Which was usually not much, so we avoided that at all costs. We knew it was not misbehaviour, the poor kid felt HORRIBLE.

Had him on Pediasure and vitamins and just prayed and hoped that he would start gaining. Once he got through that horrible time from 14-18 months, he seemed to be not too bad. he did start gaining, slowly but surely. The sweet little boy we remembered was in there somewhere. He appeared again and we were on our merry way.

By the time he was 6 or so, we took him to an endocrinologist. He weighed about 35 pounds and was very tiny. Stud and I were scrawny as kids too. Our parents reminded us of that when we worried about Brain. I knew it was more than that, though. I wondered if he had some kind of nutrient absorption problem, but the Dr's all shrugged it off. He was diagnosed with "Constitutional Growth Delay" by the Endocrinologist. Did a "bone age" test and his bones were the size of a typical 4 year old, at almost 7 years old. They told us when he hit puberty, he would suddenly grow and it would be incredibly painful for him. So far, that has not happened.

We carried on like this, with him never even ON the growth chart at the pediatrician's office. Well, that is not true. A few times he made it on and was just under the 5th percentile. As long as he did not LOSE weight, people seemed fine with it. He went for periods of a year, without gaining one pound. He did not lose, so no one seemed too worried.

I went to Costa Rica in April of 2002, to visit my brother's three kids who lived there at the time. While I was gone, Stud took Brain and Jock to get updated allergy tests. I asked him how it went, and he said fine. Told me it was no problem taking care of them all (I had been gone close to a week) and getting them to their activities, etc etc had been a breeze. He did not have any idea why I was ever frazzled at all. He thought what I do every day is a piece of cake. Although the kids told me that Daddy seemed impatient and was pretty grumpy at them:) LOL He would never admit that he got a bit frazzled. They were sure glad when I got back! LOL

Brain seemed to be always snuffling and when he read things out loud to me, as he loves to do, it was torture to listen to. He seemed completely clogged up. I took him some months later to the allergist and asked about it. They did a CT scan and could not believe it! His sinuses were totally infected and packed full. We have NO IDEA how long he had been that way. They put him on major meds, we had to do a steam sauna at least twice a day, stay in the steamy shower for a long time (which is opposite of what he needs to do to care for his skin problems) etc etc. After three months, we went back to check and they were much better, but still incredibly packed. We kept on the meds for more than 6 months and the allergist spoke of possible surgery if this did not get remedied.

I asked him to remind me what Brain was allergic to, maybe I am missing something. He looked through the chart and said that when they had been tested, about a year ago (when Stud took them), it was discovered that they are VERY allergic to chicken, of all things. CHICKEN!! I almost jumped out of the chair! We eat chicken AT LEAST 3 times a week!?!?!? I had to laugh at Stud. He said he thought it sounded a little familiar. He seemed to recall Dr. M mentioning something about the allergy test results, but he was so distracted with all the kids, etc, he totally forgot. Hmmmm....everything went fine with me gone, hmmm??? Piece of cake, eh?? LOL Now he knew what I dealt with ALL THE TIME, but would never admit that it was kind of hard to keep track of things and what I do is the least bit difficult.

Once we cut that out, Brain cleared up quickly. However, he got worse again, even with no chicken. We went back and forth trying to fix his dern sinuses, talking about surgery, etc. September of 2004, he started feeling nauseous all the time. Started having what we thought were panic attacks. That is an entire post on it's own, though.

He had never really known what it is like to feel hungry. We would ask him once in a while and he said no, he was not sure what we were talking about. As he got older and I did not make meals regularly, he would go all day without eating. Jock would make himself something for lunch and ask for snacks. At supper, I would call them all and ask Brain if he had eaten anything. He would think hard, shrug and say "No, I guess not." We have a picture of my brother's kids, my little brother and my kids taken a few summers ago. I will post it. Brain is the one in the green Costa Rica shirt, hanging onto my brother's wheelchair, looking like he is about to pass out/throw up. Because he was. My mother was frantic. Things would get so chaotic and I would forget to remind him to eat. I got impatient with him doing that. It was just another thing thing for me to do, remind a kid to eat?!??! Who needs to be reminded to eat!?!?!? I thought this was just the way he was, but if you read more, it will make more sense.

We took him to the allergist last May (2005), because he had said if Brain got another sinus infection, we would do surgery. He had yet another and were tired of all the pills to swallow, etc etc.

When we were there, he was flipping through the chart and saying, "Hmmmm...hmmmmm...uh huh..." etc over and over to himself. Then he looked shocked and asked "Has he not ever done the GERD study before?? Has he had an upper GI and been tested for GERD???"

Now, I knew what GERD was because a friend of mine has it. It had never occurred to me that my child would have it?? I thought heartburn was for pregnant people and older adults.

I said no, why would he?? What does that have to do with Sinus infections?!?! He looked like he was trying not to kick himself and like he had just made a most amazing discovery. He said that if you have GERD, the stomach acid can leak and irritate the Vegas nerve, near your diaphragm. If this nerve is irritated it can cause...


Sinus Disease


We sat staring at each other with our jaws dropped. My mind was just racing, thinking "You mean to tell me that my child has had this GERD since infancy and THAT is why he doesn't want to eat and has all these conditions?!?!?!"

There was no point in getting mad that the poor man had not thought of it before now. He had been Brain's allergist since he was a toddler. Too bad it took over 10 years for him to think of this, at least he thought of it now, right???

He gave me the # of a GI specialist to take Brain to. He said he would be surprised if she did not get him into surgery right away. He briefly went over the surgery that Brain just had on the 9th of this month and let us know what it would do, etc.

I won't bore you with the details and why it took 9 months for them to finally do it. That is why he had the surgery that he did on the 9th. They went in and tightened where the esophagus connects in the stomach. When I mentioned what Dr. M said to the surgeon, about the nerve and this maybe causing all Brain's health problems, he looked skeptical and claimed to never have heard that before. They said though, the reason he has not wanted to eat is because no matter what he eats, it causes pain and discomfort. Why would you voluntarily do that to yourself?? So I imagine him as a tiny baby, not wanting to eat because it made him feel icky:(

I had noticed the past few days that the skin on his chest, back, arms, legs etc has looked smoother. It was always scaly and rough. He sheds like crazy and his chunks and flakes of skin are all over the house. There has seriously always been a fine layer of skin all over the floor of his room. Whenever I change the sheets on his bed, it looks like it is snowing in his room. So this is very exciting for all of us:)

Saturday, as Brain and I drove to see "The Pink Panther" and spend his gift card at TRU, I asked him if I could feel his back. He grinned and leaned forward and I reached up under his coat. It was not like our's, but it is MUCH smoother and not nearly as rough. Pieces did not come off in my hand, as they always have. I was trying not to cry, but I know he knew how choked up I was.

He beamed at me and put his head sideways how he does when he gets emotional. He could not stop grinning. I said "Maybe Dr. M knows what he is talking about after all, eh?? The surgeon just fixed you, but he doesn't know details. How is your nose??" He said very proudly, "I can breathe out of my left nostril."

I tried not to scream with delight. It tends to frighten them when I do that.

So there you are, longwinded, but I hope it makes some sense. Tomorrow, if all goes well, I will start the saga of Jock. I will look for the photo I mentioned, but can't now. I must clean up the school room. Clown has been after me to sit down and do math lessons with him, so I need to jump on that. I can't do it when there is disorder in the area we do "school". I want to to start math with him tomorrow and have a big clean up job ahead of me. They have gotten into all the craft stuff, paints, etc and it takes a while to clean up and organise again.

Hope everyone had a great long weekend!

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Nose warmer

Just remembered I told my mom I would post a picture of Clown with the treat she crocheted him.

This is his nose warmer. Apparently, when we were up in the prairies this past holiday season, Clown and his Granny had a discussion about this. She got it finished and mailed it with their Valentine parcel.

He is pleased as can be and it came none too soon. Things are getting chilly indeed.

Dad, please do not forget to show this to Mom.


That is how my bro and I used to say deodorant.

HOW on EARTH does the stuff get all over everything??

I make a point of putting on my shirt FIRST. This morning, I am wearing a sleeve-less shirt. Of course it is black. So I make certain that it is on like it is supposed to be.

Then, I lift up me arms and carefully swipe the stuff underneath. I learned the hard way not to put it on and THEN put on the shirt or whatever the top part of my ensemble is. No one taught me this, that I can recollect. It is just amazing that I figured this out.

I vow to let my kids in on life's little nuggets of wisdom such as this. Save them some time and humiliation.

So I am pleased that all is well, and move to get the shirt that goes on over top of said sleeve-less shirt. Something seems to be glowing in my peripheral vision. Seriously. Luminescent almost.

ACK!!!!!!!!! A large glob of blasted deodorant is sitting on the front of my shirt!?!?

Down low, near to the tummy region, no less!?!?!?


Am I the only freak that this happens to???

Speak up people.

I know you are out there reading this.


Alright, the little ones and I are off to a birthday party. I guess non church going people do not think about church going people when they plan these things?? LOL

Stud and the older two just left. He plays guitar during both services, and the older ones are NOT staying home alone. They have not been to their SS classes in months. So they get to go early and watch Stud and the rest of the worship team get ready for the services. Then it is off to their classes.

The party is from 10-noon. At some type of Playground Equipment selling place. If it is the place I think it is, we have been to one party there about 4 or 5 years ago. I know the kids will have fun, but Clown is being Clown. Very nervous, because there will be people that he does not know there. I told him that he can stay with me and visit with M and M.

The birthday child is the granddaughter of friends of ours. The aforementioned M&M. Stud has worked with this man since we moved here from SC in '91. Besides from '97-00 when we were back in SC, that is. Since Stud's family lives in SC and mine is in Canada, these guys have been like surrogate grand-parents to our kids. They try to make it to all the dance recitals, the HSing talent show where Brain will play his violin, some hockey games, etc etc.

Their grand daughter is right in between the ages of Clown and Princess. Princess just turned 5 in October, this birthday girl is 6 today and Clown will be 7 in May. They all three get along wonderfully and love to play together. We missed her past two birthdays, so are going to for sure make it to this one.

I will leave you with a quick snapshot from last week, when Jock suddenly decided to get his hair chopped off. He has had one trim since September of 2004. It was quite long and he tired of being mistaken for a girl. I totally forgot about his earrings! He has two piercings in his left ear and I have not seen them in months! LOL He is not thrilled, because he has a lot of moles and forgot about them. There are a lot, especially on the left side of his neck. I think they add character. He doesn't like moles, he had to have one removed a few years ago, but more on that when I devote some posts to him.

When he was getting the cut, Clown decided since Jock looked so good, he would get his curls cut off. So here they are, with Princess, at the haircutting place.

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Saturday update

Stud just took the younger three skating and I am waiting for Brain to get out of the shower. He has expressed an interest in getting out and about. When he does this, we jump on it. It does not happen often! I am glad he is feeling well enough to do anything. He had to do a few chores yesterday, and seemed almost happy about it! He is tired of laying around.

He and I are planning on some shopping at Toys R Us, so he can spend the gift card he got from friends whilst in the hospital. He has some gift cards for book stores also and would like to look into spending those. After that, we hope to take in a movie. Most likely "The Pink Panther" or "Eight Below". He has not decided as yet.

So yes, I am trying to think of more ways to describe him, so that I can move on to Jock and eventually my other two. Still need to yammer on about my friend C who was recently here (I miss her dearly! *sniff*) as well as my baby brother. I want to include photos with much of these, but our scanner is on the fritz, Stud keeps talking about buying another. Lo and behold, the funds are often needed elsewhere, you know how it is!

Let's see...he is very caring, as I said. Can't stand to see anyone, including animals, hurting. If he hears one of his siblings scream or yell, he jumps up protectively to see what, if anything, is wrong. Notice I said "If he hears". If he is playing a video game, reading or watching TV...he WILL NOT hear it!!!

He has always been social, enjoyed other people's company. He gets that from his Dad. I am more of a loner. I enjoy talking, don't get me wrong. I am just as happy to talk to myself as to anyone else. LOL Clown in like me in that area, but I am getting ahead of myself.

Yes, he enjoys other people and has surprised me in his confidence level. I was not as confident as he is until I was about 30! He does not hesitate to speak his mind and unfortunately can come across as rude and condescending. He has been told not to be so cynical. He is small and wiry, but has no problem going over to someone who is picking on another and speaking up boldly and telling them to leave the person alone. Something about him causes people to listen and take him seriously.

He is unusual as a teen in that he cares nothing about what he looks like, wears, says, etc. He is just happy in his own skin and I love it! Jock gets embarrassed often going anywhere with Brain. Brain won't comb his hair, tuck in his shirt, etc. Jock is beside himself and pleads with me to do something. I remind him that I want them all to be who they are, and to concern himself with himself, his brother is fine how he is.

He is mature for his age, but also still enjoys typical "child" things. When he feels himself getting impatient or bored with something juvenile, it seems like once that occurs to him, he panics and kind of seems to force himself to enjoy it or sit through it. Like he is thinking "OH NO!! I am getting older, I need to stop this somehow!"

He has NO desire to drive, leave home or grow up. He was so dreading his 13th birthday this past fall, I felt SO BAD for him. I remember being the same way, not wanting it to end. I knew there was no going back and enjoyed every day. Stud and I keep on telling him before he knows it, he won't be able to get away from us soon enough. He still doesn't believe us! LOL He won't even let us drop him at a movie or the mall to just hang around with friends. He thinks that is ridiculous and wonders why we would suggest it. So we obviously do not force it, when he is ready, we will let him. He had a friend over last night, she just walked over after school, had supper, they visited, etc and then Stud took her home around 8:30. He will spend a weekend at a friend's house, a friend will spend a weekend or a few nights here and he is fine with that. Seeing friends at church etc. Sees no reason to go out to a movie/mall etc without us. Whereas Jock is chomping at the bit for us to allow him to! LOL

He seems to really be able to look ahead and realise the consequences of his actions. I am very proud of who he is becoming and know I can trust him explicitly. He has lied 4 times in his life, was caught every time and cried miserably and was harder on himself than his father and I. So far, besides health issues and a bit of attitude, he is an easy son to raise.

There is much more, but I need to move on to Jock. Maybe tomorrow.

Have a great weekend!!!

Thursday, February 16, 2006

More about Brain

Here he is at 2 years old:)

I have told him about this blog and what I named him. I explained that I considered "Bookworm", since that describes him more accurately, but that I was too lazy to type that out all the time. Brain is shorter.

He asked me to call him "Viper" on here. I said I have already confused people, I am sorry, you are Brain for the time being.

Where was I??? Ah yes. Bana Spit.

So things were good. He loved preschool. It was actually more like a day care centre, I realised later. He was allergic to milk and they continued to give it to him and not listen to me when I reminded them. They did not listen to him when he told them either. So he did what any other kid would do when given a forbidden treat. He drank it!! Luckily he was growing out of the allergy, but still. What if it was VERY serious?? I was not impressed with that.

He was almost 3 when he started there and he LOVED IT. I have since understood that there is no need for preschool and have not sent my younger two. Just another expense and place to remember to drop off and pick up. They learn on their own, and Clown is my prime example of that. I will save that for my posts on him! I did it then, because I thought that was what one does when they have children.

They did some educational type things sometimes, but mainly just sat them in front of the TV most of the time. Which is not a good thing to do with him. He loses himself in it and won't move for hours.

He sat in front of Pooh Bear movies for about 4 months during my early pregnancy with Jock. He was SUCH an easy toddler and baby, etc. I had no choice, I was horribly sick and would vomit if I moved. He sat in his little seat at the foot of the couch where I laid all morning feeling guilty that I could not get up and play with him like always.

He assured me all was well, he was in his element!!! Nothing has changed in that department. This past week, recovering from surgery, he has watched more TV/Movies than he normally watches in about 3 months time!

His skin condition would settle down from time to time and then get worse again. He was always itchy and scratching and every time we gave him a bath, we had to smear all manner of ointments and creams on him and then cover his feet AND hands with socks, to let it all soak in. He got very self conscious about this and when he was about 5, told me of a nightmare he had.

He said he was laying in the tub soaking (we had been instructed to submerge as much of him as possible and get him good and wet before we got him out and "greased him up" as we came to call it) when he got itchy and was scratching so much he could not stop. He said that he looked down and the bath tub was full of blood and all his skin was floating on the surface of the water and that he was just a skeleton. What five year old should have to be tormented that way?? It was heart breaking for me to see him suffer like he was, but I always thanked God he did not have leukemia or CF or anything life threatening of course.

He is a very sensitive person. Incredibly caring and thoughtful. He is like his Father in the way that they are both off in their own little world much of the time. They literally tune out everything that is going on around them. My other kids enjoy things, but are more like me. If they are doing something they really enjoy, they are still aware that other people are around and there is activity.

If Brain is watching something, playing a video game, reading, etc. You literally have to go over and touch him a few times and put your face in his face to get him to come "out of it" and realise you have been talking to him or that you need his attention. The others can be doing those things and you talk and they just look up from it and respond to you. Jock and Brain will be playing a video game and I start saying something and Jock will finally have to pause the game and he yells "BRAIN! Mom is TALKING to you!?!?! HELLO!?!?!"

For this reason, when he is left caring for the younger two, he is not allowed to do any of those things. I am terrified that one of them will be hurt or something and he will be oblivious. They play board games or do something crafty. He is starting to be able to control this a little bit and be more aware that he is this way. He wants to be able to watch a movie with them or something when we leave him with them. He is showing great promise in this area.

Somehow, even being this way, he does have the ability to multi-task in some areas. I remember when he was in grade three, I was HSing him again. He had attended a private Kindergarten in South Carolina. Only reason I put him in there was because we had just moved down there and knew NO ONE. I wanted him to make some friends. I had planned on HSing them, but wanted to give him a chance to meet some kids. Then I HSed for grade one. By the time he was in Grade two, we had moved back here {PRAISE GOD!!) and I was pregnant with Princess. I did not think I could do a good job teaching he and Jock as well as caring for a toddler and a newborn. I now know better, but hindsight is 20/20, right?

So when I had them home again, I thought I was not teaching them all they needed to know, so I put them back in. He was in grade three, I guess it was. I would go volunteer in his class and was amazed that the teacher would allow him to be reading a book while she was teaching. I asked her about it. Don't the other kids get jealous that they can't, etc etc?? She said no, everyone is fine with it. Watch this.

So I was at my table, doing whatever and she was talking and asking questions. Brain was reading, but when she would direct a question at him, he would not hesitate. He would not even look up from the book sometimes, just keep reading, and give her a detailed answer and even add some extra info for good measure. She would look at me all excited like "Uh?? What do you think of that??!?!" I thought it was rude on his part and was surprised she permitted it! She just seemed so impressed.

Around that same time, we got a letter in the mail, saying something about a Highly Capable Program that they wanted him in. We had not heard of this, but apparently he would be bussed to another school the next fall. I had planned on HSing them again, but Stud wanted to check into it. They sent us various test results and it showed that he was reading at the level of a 2nd year college student. He was 7 years old.

I started asking around, to see what other mothers knew about this. I knew he would do well at home. He learns at his own pace. Takes his time on things he needs to (Math) and speeds along at things he excells at. I didn't want to mess with that. Not to mention I want to be the major influence until they have a good foundation to stand on. There are MANY reasons why I Homeschool them.

It was the saddest thing. The mothers I asked, were all JEALOUS that Brain got into this!?!?!? Apparently this was a coveted letter and some of them actually said to me, "My son could have gotten in to that school, if only he would apply himself."

THEY ARE LITTLE BOYS!?!?!! What do you want them to do!?!? They are busy learning how to spit and snap their fingers and whistle for crying out loud!?!? Only reason Brain got in is because his passion happens to be something that is academic. When you are passionate about something and it interests you, you will tend to excell at it. Or at least enjoy it immensely. HE taught himself how to read, because he was passionate about it. He knew there was something magical about this thing I did with him for hours a day, that he begged for more and more. He knew if he worked at it, he could unlock the code and do this wonderful thing for himself. So he did.

I don't understand people who push thier children to be someone they aren't. I guess that is another blog for another day.

Clown is here telling me about a dream he had, signing off for now...

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

More pics of my boy:)

The sibs came to visit before heading to Jock's Hockey Tourny in Spokane.

Sleeps a lot. Balloons from friends in Spokane.

Back home. See all the cards, gifts and goodies??

Able to stand up better now. Showing his incisions.

Will explain what the surgery was about soon, when I discuss more of my sweet Brain. I need to get some pics of him when he was younger, to go with the posts:)

Jock has decided to get his long hair chopped off, must take him before he changes his mind:)

Tuesday, February 14, 2006


So I guess I will explain some history on my boy.

I remember a man that Stud and I worked with (I was the receptionist at Stud's office for a few months during the pregnancy) told me that I was having a boy.

We had not found out what the baby was going to be and I remember the moment he said that it dawned on me that the baby would actually be a certain gender. Until that point, I was just so glad to be having a child, that it honestly did not register with me that what I gave birth to would not just be a person, but someone with a particular gender. I felt kind of stupid about the whole thing! LOL

I was put on bedrest the last two months of the pregnancy. We had 4 cats and they lounged around all over me and got knocked off of me often by Brain jumping around in there. It was SO BORING and I was not able to get up and clean or anything. I finally had no choice, we needed clean clothes at some point! So the turd decided to be ELEVEN DAYS OVERDUE, after all that.

We found out that the man was right. We had a little boy. His father is the 4th in line with the EXACT same name. I cannot stand that and think people should have their own identity and not be named after people. Especially so many on and on...and on...and on...give it up already!

Stud told me before we were married that it did not matter to him if we did not name a son after him and his father...and his get the idea. I told him that was good, because if he married me, he would be guaranteed it would never happen. He was the end of the line with that particular name. Once we were expecting Brain, he changed his tune and tried to convince me to cave in. It is one of the few areas I have stood my ground on. Brain actually goes by his middle name, which causes confusion and is annoying. Stud did not want his first name to be shortened, so did not want him to go by that. What a pain that has been! LOL

So on we went. The first few years were rough, being that we lived in an apartment and I had no driver's license or way to get around. We had hardly any money, but there was always food and heat and light, somehow.

While I had been pregnant with Brain, a woman we worked with was due with Twins. She is a fellow Canuck and we were SO SAD when she lost both her little girls during about the 6th month. By the end of my pregnancy with Brain, she was expecting again! This time she had a baby boy and I ended up caring for him in our apartment two days a week, for some extra spending money. It was very helpful and Brain had a playmate. Actually, he had a baby 6 months younger than him who he could beat on if I could not get to the baby fast enough to stop Brain! LOL We cared for him until he was a year old. We have kept in touch sporadically since then.

When Brain was 13 months old, he was rattling off all the shapes, colours, etc etc. He loved to sit and colour (what kid that age colours!??! Don't they usually chew on crayons?? Not this one!) or just read books. Our Doc was blown away and said he would be reading by the time he was two. By the time he was 18 months old, he could carry on a conversation with any adult. I did not realise at the time how unusual this was, I just enjoyed his company! LOL

At this time, he also got quite sick. Until he was 3 months old, he gained weight well and seemed fine, except for a horrid case of excema. He was 2 months old and had the motor skills to reach around and actually scratch his little head. We had to grease him up with creams and gels and still do to this day. Well, he does it himself now:)

By the time he was 7 months old, the Doc did not know what to do with him and sent him to another one. He was losing weight, would not eat and was dubbed "Failure to Thrive". My parents had taken care of many foster children with this problem over the years, so I had seen it first hand. I never expected my own child to not thrive. He had NO appetite and grew extremely slowly.

From the time he was 13 or 14 months old, until he was 18 months or so, he and I were at the Dr's office a minimum of twice a week. He was vomiting constantly, coughing like crazy and started doing a nebulizer to get medicine into his lungs. Something else he still does to this day, he just did it last night. I need to remember to get him to clean the mask off.

He had bronchitis, pneumonia AND Croup all during that time. Lost weight, which was horrible since he weighed about 15 lbs at the time. That is what a healthy 6 or 7 month old child weighs, if not more. And here he was almost a year older than that. He did not get to 20 lbs until he was almost 2 years old. He was very sickly and it was a horribly scary time.

I remember being at the Dr.'s one time and he threw up all over the bathroom. It was just slime, like always. The veins would pop out of his head and he was just screaming (when he could catch his breath) and this was about the 14th time in as many days that we were there. I did not want to scare him, but I finally collapsed on the floor and started crying along with him. I was exhausted and worried beyond reason. It all just erupted at one time. There seemed to be nothing they could do for him, he was on all sorts of medications, they tested him for Cystic Fibrosis (talk about being terrified!), were always taking blood (that was SO FUN when they made ME help them hold him down and he would scream and plead at me with his eyes. He did not understand why I was helping them hurt him) and doing x-rays and could not find anything. Almost as quickly as the horror of those 4 months started, they quit. He was well again. Well, as well as he could be.

When he was almost 2, we took him to his first movie in the Theatre. It was the "Lion King". I will always remember him sitting there all tiny surrounded by Stud, myself and two of our friends. When the big screen came up that is all green and says...whatever it says. He SCREECHED "Oooooooo...BIGUN...GEEN...TEEFEEEEEE!!!!" In case that is not clear, allow me to translate-

OOooooooo, big one, green TV.

Almost a year later, he started music lessons. By now Jock was born and was a wee babe. After his first lesson, I took him to DQ to get a Banana Split for a treat. They were taking a LONG time to make it and he and I were getting tired of waiting. It had been about 15 minutes and NO ONE else was in there. They had forgotten all about making it. I was just about to go say something when tiny little Brain sauntered over to the counter, leaned over on one foot and screamed back at the people -

"HEY!! Where's my BANA SPIT, you DOUGH HEADS!!!!"

To be continued.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Photos from Brain's adventure!

Ok, so this one is him once the IV was in...let's hope this stupid program co-operates with me this time!

Now this is once he was brought back from Recovery.

Ok, that is all I am doing for now. I have 4 or 5 more, but these two have taken 15 minutes!?!?!? I need to go play wid my babies, they are back from Spokane. I will do the rest another time.

Talk about loved and spoiled

So Brain is now sitting up and getting up on his own. As I type this, he is putting together a big Bionicle Set that a woman from our HSing group bought for him.

She had e-mailed me all upset because she felt bad because she had not known he was even having surgery or anything. Wanted to come over and help clean, do laundry, anything.

I told her there was no need, so she insisted on buying him a book or something. I sent her a list that he e-mails me frequently, with updates of what Bionicles he has purchased, what ones he is saving for, etc. Suggested she buy him one of the $8 ones at the end of the list, I was not sure which ones were cheapest, but some things on the list are the big expensive sets he gets for Christmas/Birthday or saves for months.

So I had to go to Target yesterday for tooth paste. I believe I mentioned earlier that my darling husband and sweetheart of a son (who are two peas in a pod in many areas) took it upon themselves to take the only two decent tubes of toothpaste in the house with them to the hockey tournament in Spokane. They were staying in the same hotel room in but for some reason, they each needed their own tube??

Oh sure, I could use some nasty fruity flavoured Barbie or Power Ranger junk out of Clown and Princesses bathroom (incidentally, Stud neglected to take them any toothpaste OR toothbrushes and said that I was supposed to pack it for him. Oppps, sorry, I was sitting in the hospital all day with our son who had surgery. Can't do it all! Yes, you sense bitterness and extreme frustration) but I did not see the need. I want to CLEAN my teeth and have my mouth feel fresh. I need mint. They refuse to use mint because it "stings"?? Whatever. Talk to the hand.

So when I was in Target, getting said item, as well as a new Xbox game for Brain ($18 down from $50, you gotta love it!!) lo and behold, there is my buddy H, with this big, expensive Bionicle Set for Brain!?!?

I told her to put it back right now, she was not spending that on him.

She laughed at me! LOL So she gave it to me and said how great it was we ran into each other. I call those God moments. He truly has His hand in every small detail of life.

Stud's mother sent Brain some pretty flowers in a mug, with balloons attached. C, since she could not be here for him and had to go home early, gave me money for a Bionicle for him. I also admit to buying him two books to complete his "Series of Unfortunate Events" collection that my brother (the writer, who teaches at a college and has stated the wish that Brain was in his class instead of some of those people who are!!) started buying for him a few years ago.

So he has gotten all kinds of goodies. My friend, who is in Nursing school dropped by yesterday with a milkshake for him. He fell asleep when she was here and she blew him a kiss when she left. He woke up later and looked around all sad and mumbled "Where is E?? Did she have to leave??"

I must go check on him now and get him to drink more water. He has not had pain meds since yesterday afternoon sometime. I really need to coerce him into the shower!!!

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Rice Krispies

Brain just ate some! YAHOO!! Washed them down with some apple juice and is now sitting up watching TV.

We got home yesterday afternoon. That is a story in itself, which I may or may not divulge here. I don't want to be too negative or critical, but seems the hospital staff need to pay more attention to their patients. I was not impressed with some stuff that happened.

Anywooo, here we are. Last night was a bit rough, he needs help moving at all. He hurts to bad, can't even shift his own weight, laugh, or even talk. I got up at 2 to help him, he said he needed to walk around a bit. He and I had worked together since we got home around 4, to get up every few hours and walk around the house a bit. Took great pains to get him up from where he was, and settled again.

So you can imagine my delight,when he came into the bedroom this morning, glanced at me in the bed, and then turned and padded away softly in his moccasins his Granny and Grandad got him a few years ago. Sweet guy had gotten up by himself and walked over here, but not only that, thought I was asleep and left, hungry, to let me sleep more.

HE is the one who needs help and what does he do?? Thinks of ME and my comfort?? I tell you, this guy is a keeper:) He has always been that way. I love it!

So I got up and asked him what he needed. I suggested the cereal because I saw on the dietician's sheet that he could have that. After 2 days of water, jello, pudding, broth and juice, I am sure that was very welcome! He did seem very excited and ate it all up!

I will post a few pictures of him in the hospital etc soon, after I have his permission of course.

Stud and Jock took every tube of toothpaste in the house to the Hockey Tournament in Spokane, for some odd reason. So my goal for today is to go and buy more and help Brain. I am just SO HAPPY that this morning he is moving on his own and can eat something like Rice Krispies.


Friday, February 10, 2006

Update on the Brainster

Off to the hospital soon. What a day yesterday!

They changed the times around and told me to get him to the hospital by 8, not 9 like they had told me just a few days before. I am very glad Stud remembered to let me know that, cause I was gone taking C back up to Vancouver when they called. I would have had no idea unless he told me.

So we left at 7 yesterday morning, to make sure we got there by 8. I knew morning traffic into Seattle would be bad, but had no idea HOW bad.

We averaged about 25 miles an hour until we got right INTO the city itself!?!? Even in the carpool lane. Was very anxious and I knew better, because I suspected that we would sit for half an hour or so once we got there anyway, and I was right.

The surgery was mentioned back in a November post somewhere...let me go look...Ah yes, November 10th of last year. I explain a wee bit. I will explain in greater detail shortly, when I post about each of my kids.

Have not heard anything this morning, but last I heard when Stud just arrived there and called me at a little past midnight last night, his oxygen level had improved and his fever had gone down. When I left him in the hospital to rush back here so Stud could go and be with him, his oxygen was 90 and he was getting quite a fever. The people at the hospital were great, until we got him settled in his room. Those nurses sure are interesting. More on that later, perhaps.

The surgery took about 3 hours. The surgeon had originally told me that he would be in there for 2-3 days, but yesterday told me he may be released today. They found adhesions on his liver, so we need to ask more about that. He thought that was from all the stomach acid or something.

The main complaint Brain had was his shoulders and collarbone hurting. They had him on a morphine drip and he was out of it most of yesterday. The surgeon told me that those places would hurt more than the 5 incisions because of them pushing around in there with the cameras, etc.

It was horrible to see him how he was. I guess I did not realise what a big deal it was or something, but he was just pitiful. When you give him a new video game and he just looks at it, mutters "Sorry for the lack of gratitude, but I just can't focus on things..." and then goes to sleep again, you KNOW it is serious! I came home last night and Stud went in to stay with him.

I need to figure out how to call and get an update while the other kids are taking turns having their showers. Cell phones are not allowed in there and I can't find where Stud put the # to the hospital room so I can call. I would have thought he would have called me by now to update. So I am going to find the # and call and see how my poor guy is doing. I hope he is better than yesterday so his sibs don't get too scared when they see him!!

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Brain goes under the knife

Ok, getting closer.

Tomorrow morning at 9:30, my baby will be cut open in 5 places. Small incisions, to be sure. But incisions none-the-less.

I am getting nervous. He is very nervous. This is what he wrote in his journal today:

I'm getting pretty nervous about my surgery now. It's tomorrow. I hope its done quickly. I know I won't feel a thing, but I keep having this weird vision popping up in my head,where the anesthetic wears off in the middle of the procedure.

MY POOR BABY!! I know it will all be ok, and will be SO GLAD when it is over.

He just got out of the shower, must go talk with him...

Monday, February 06, 2006

Ok, I guess I feel a bit like talking

Alright, some stuff rattling around in this noggin. Nothing organised, but who are we kidding?? Is it ever?

Had a nice weekend. Got to go looking around a bit (I guess they call that shopping??) with C and went to a movie.

Princess got a bed last week and everyone is very excited about that. She needed out of the toddler bed long ago, but Stud did not want to pay for a twin bed. We compromised and got her a twin mattress, so the child has been sleeping on the floor. I finally convinced him to spring for a bed and we found a CUTE one for a very reasonable price. Got her a matching night stand also. Her room is so cute, I would have loved it when I was 15, let alone 5! She has way too much, but luckily she really appreciates it all and gets hours of fun from all the goodies. We are almost done getting it how she and I want it, but we are focusing on Jock and Clown's now. All three boys used to share it and nothing has been done to it in 5 years. It needs an update bad.

The first night she got it, Clown wanted to sleep under it. They were so amazed that Princess actually HAD an under, to sleep under! LOL Jock and Brain have beds handed down from Stud's parents' lake house. They are very low and you can't get under them. Brain has a high loft bed, with desk etc under it. NO one is allowed in his room anyway.

So they wanted to sleep under there, argued over who could until Princess agreed with her Dad and I that no one would. So Jock slept on the floor on one side and Clown on the other, with Missy girl in her fancy, pretty bed. Funny, the things that please and excite kids.

Brain will go for surgery on Thursday morning. I am starting to get a wee bit nervous for him. I have a new GBA game all ready to surprise him with and will stay with him as much as I can. Will come home nights, etc. I think he may get out as early as Saturday, no later than Sunday if there are no complications.

Today Jock scared us all a bit. He asked to go up to the school with some of his friends. They are 11, 13 and I think one is 13 or 14. If I ever let him do that, I normally send my cell phone with him, but neglected to this time. I guess I figured he was with 3 guys, things would be fine. If anyone bothered them, they could handle it. So he was gone about an hour when I sent Brain to find him.

He is usually very good about letting me know where he is, when. If he tells me he is going somewhere, he will let me knows if plans change and he is back earlier, or what have you.

So I sent Brain up there and he kept on calling me and saying he could not find any of them. He was so funny, he really does talk...well, he is very articulate. People always comment but I am so used to it, I don't pay much attention. He was talking about "walking around the perimeter" and other things I can't remember right now. He was up there over 20 minutes and I was getting scared. When I called Stud to see what we should do, I was pacing and happened to glance out the window and saw Jock across the street at one of the guy's houses. I called him in right away and then called Brain and told him to come home.

The reason I say this is that I thought Brain would be upset and mad at Jock. He had been after me all day to let him read certain books, he had done his chores and all the assigned school work. He had JUST settled with a book when I asked him to go get Jock, and then come to find out that he was across the street the entire time?!?!

This is a quote from Brain's journal entry about the whole ordeal. He describes what happened and then says:

Of course this greatly relieved and infuriated me.

I find that amusing. He is so funny! He just gave Jock and look when he came into the house and Jock tried to hug him and then they discussed it and Jock agreed to do all Brain's chores for a certain amount of time.

Dern kid!!!

So tonight Clown and Princess wanted to sleep in her Tinkerbell Tent. I snapped this from the hole on top of the tent. I could not see them at all, just hoped to get them both in. I thought it turned out kinda neat! Hope it doesn't do too much of a number on your eyes!!

Off to bed!

Thursday, February 02, 2006


I appear to be in a funk. I was planning on writing about my little brother, but nothing is coming. I am avoiding it. Guess I am not ready. Also, I think that I will go on and on because there is so much to say about him. So maybe I can do it in stages. Not sure what will happen.

He w0uld have been 14 this past Saturday. Was weird not to call him and listen to his precious noises as I asked him questions. I could always just picture the grin on his face when I talked to him.

I will post a picture of him, from 3 summers ago. My Dad was just getting him ready for bed here.

When I feel closer to myself again, I may post some more. I guess I am going on hiatus. We shall see how long it lasts.